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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28560849">Your First Steps</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ceciliasheplin/pseuds/ceciliasheplin'>ceciliasheplin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bondage, Breeding, Breeding Kink, Briefly Painful Sex, Dark Rey (Star Wars), Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Fuck the Jedi, Happy Ending, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Jedi Ben Solo, Kidnapping, LITERALLY, Loss of Virginity, No Pregnancy, Redemption, Rey Needs A Hug (Star Wars), Rey Nobody, Skywalker Family, Talk about pregnancy, This is my Jedi Order, This is not the Dark!Rey fic you're looking for, Torture, Visions of pregancy, not as dark as the tags imply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 01:13:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,855</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28560849</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ceciliasheplin/pseuds/ceciliasheplin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Darksider Kira Ren must face the wrath of her master after she fails to kill the Jedi Ben Solo.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>127</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I had forgotten how fun it was to write canonverse! So here is my take on Dark!Rey, but like I said, it's not as dark as it should be. Still, mind the tags and as for the archive warning, there's a description of it in the endnotes.</p>
<p>Thank you to <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenOfCarrotFlowers/pseuds/QueenOfCarrotFlowers">QueenOfCarrotFlowers</a> and <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/duelingaxis/pseuds/duelingaxis">duelingaxis</a> for the beta and <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/darthdarcyy/pseuds/darthdarcyy">darthdarcyy</a> for the moodie!</p>
<p>Manip of Jedi!Ben by me.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p>
<p>Kira Ren did her best not to tremble as she knelt down in front of her master, staring at the obsidian durasteel floor which contrasted with the crimson walls of the throne room. His red guards stood around the imposing throne, where her master looked down upon her.</p>
<p>Snoke’s rage boiled under the placid surface of his control.</p>
<p>“So, my young apprentice,” Snoke began. “The Jedi still lives?”</p>
<p>“Y-yes, master.” His disapproval surged at her tone, so she looked up and squared her shoulders. “Yes.” She said, firmly.</p>
<p>Snoke’s cold eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly. “And why is that?”</p>
<p>Kira knew it was futile to lie. “I failed, master.”</p>
<p>His rage was coming, she knew, but the lightning was nothing compared to this kind of torture.</p>
<p>She felt his power wrapping around her mind and soaking in, invading every corner of it. He searched it freely and she had learned long ago not to try to resist him. The sooner he found what he was looking for the sooner it would end.</p>
<p>Snoke’s presence focused on a memory.</p>
<p>Ben Solo was on the snowy ground, propped on his elbows, with an ugly gash on his face. His lightsaber lay broken a few feet from them, its deep blue kyber crystal visible from the ruined metal shell. He was looking at her with a fierce expression, not asking for mercy, he was challenging her to kill him.</p>
<p>She raised her lightstaff and…</p>
<p>… extinguished the crimson light of her weapon.</p>
<p>Snoke examined the memory deeper, searching, scraping, hurting. And then he found what he was looking for.</p>
<p>Her deep compassion for the Jedi. Her admiration for the magnificent warrior that he was. Her curiosity in finding out more about him than what he barked at her when they met in battle. Their connection in the Force, how Ben Solo had seen so many things about her, even her old name. But most importantly, Snoke saw her nascent, but strong desire for the Jedi, as much as her affection.</p>
<p>Snoke let go with a jerk, as if he was disgusted.</p>
<p>Against her will, a deep shame attacked her. She knew that she was going to be punished for that too, on top of everything.</p>
<p>“You,” Snoke sneered, his voice rising. “Kira Ren, Master of the Knights of Ren, acolyte of Darkness, my apprentice, were defeated by <em> this </em>?” Snoke roared the last word and she flinched, her strength abandoning her.</p>
<p>She opened her mouth to speak but a bright, cold light assaulted her entire being.</p>
<p>Her scream ripped from her throat through the throne room as her body burned with the excruciating pain from the lightning. It was too much, she was sure she was going to die.</p>
<p>But as always, Snoke released her just before she lost consciousness and her body dropped painfully on the floor. Gasping desperately for air, she crawled towards her master, all her nerves on fire with the lingering pain of his torture. No matter how many times she had taken it, she would never get used to it.</p>
<p>“Forgive me, master…” she weakly whispered, reaching out a hand.</p>
<p>“Silence!” Snoke bellowed. “You are weak, and foolish! After all I’ve done for you, this is how you repay me.”</p>
<p>She tried to get up but her muscles wouldn’t do it, so she channeled her energy into swallowing her tears.</p>
<p>“You had him!” Another shot of lightning, but she couldn't take in enough air to scream. “You had him at your feet, vanquished, his lightsaber broken! And you spared him?”</p>
<p>She lay limp on the floor, tears burning in her eyes despite her efforts.</p>
<p>“Stop your whining!” Snoke chided. “I should have left you at that junkyard to rot like the weak child you are... Rey...”</p>
<p>Snoke uttered her old, forbidden name with venom and that made all the pain turn to rage in her heart. She wasn’t weak, she wasn’t insignificant. She was Kira Ren, the most feared Darksider in the galaxy.</p>
<p>And yet there she was, on the floor, with a dull ache in her chest that had nothing to do with her physical pain.</p>
<p>“Take her away.” Snoke said to the guards, who lifted Rey harshly by her arms and dragged her away.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>“I have a mission for you, my apprentice,” Snoke said. After days of anxiety, he had summoned her again and Kira Ren was grateful to her merciful master. “A way for you to redeem yourself and prove your worth.”</p>
<p>“Thank you, master.” Kira’s heart soared. She was eager to show him.</p>
<p>“You will abduct the Jedi Ben Solo,” Snoke said and she immediately began imagining ways to do this, what kind of traps she would use, or the illusions she would create in the Force... “And you will make him breed you.”</p>
<p>Kira’s mind halted.</p>
<p>“Master?” The word came out of her mouth in a short breath.</p>
<p>“You will use this connection that you share and lure him in. You will mate with him and you will bear a child. One that will be more powerful than you. But not only that,” Snoke grinned, “This is my revenge. We will steal the mighty Skywalker blood and raise it in the Darkness.”</p>
<p>A deep, viscous loathing and disgust formed in the pit of her stomach.</p>
<p>“Once you are impregnated, you will execute him publicly, so all the Skywalkers will see,” Snoke continued. “Then we will announce it to the galaxy. You will have been the vessel for my new and more powerful apprentice. A Skywalker, no less.”</p>
<p>Her weak heart sank and she was helpless to hide it.</p>
<p>
  <em> A vessel. </em>
</p>
<p>“What is it, Kira?” Snoke slowly inquired. “Are you not happy with my orders?”</p>
<p>“I am, master.” She quickly bowed her head.</p>
<p>“Don’t you want to please your master?”</p>
<p>“Y-yes, my lord.”</p>
<p>“Then you will do as I say.”</p>
<p>Kira knew Snoke chose to ignore the emotions he saw in her, so she took advantage of the fact, shoving them violently away into the hidden corner of her heart.</p>
<p>“I will not fail you, master.” She spoke, tilting her chin up. “I swear.”</p>
<p>“If you fail me, I will find other ways to achieve my goal.” She shuddered, imagining the implications of it. “But I am giving you this last chance to prove yourself worthy.”</p>
<p>“Thank you, master.” Kira said.</p>
<p>“Go.”</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>It had been almost too easy to lure him into the trap. All it took was a fake distress call from one of the poorest planets and there he was, not two days after she had been given her mission.</p>
<p>The Shining Jedi Knight. The great Luke Skywalkers’ nephew. Leia Organa and Han Solo’s son. The prodigy Jedi, heir to the Force itself. The beacon of hope in the galaxy.</p>
<p><em> Ben </em>.</p>
<p>She had frozen him and taken his newly repaired lightsaber from his hand before he could look at her. She was relieved for not having to face his deep brown eyes again.</p>
<p>He was now tied to her bed, in her chambers in the Finalizer, unconscious, with a Force-suppression collar around his neck.</p>
<p>She took a moment to look at him. His alabaster skin dotted with moles contrasted with his black hair and red lips. His wound had healed nicely, leaving behind an impressively discreet scar. He looked younger in his sleep and even more beautiful.</p>
<p>Kira was so nervous, but she put that away along with the rest and waved her hand.</p>
<p>Ben awoke with a gasp and looked around until his scared eyes met her cool ones.</p>
<p>“Rey?” He breathed out.</p>
<p>“Greetings, Jedi,” she said, letting the last word linger in the air. “Welcome.”</p>
<p>“Where am I?”</p>
<p>“You’re my guest.”</p>
<p>Ben Solo uselessly fought against the restraints, wide-eyed and breathing hard.</p>
<p>“Untie me,” he said, but he wasn’t angry. “Please, let me go.”</p>
<p>“The Supreme Leader has a plan for you. And I will see it through.”</p>
<p>He gulped.</p>
<p>In her mind, she put up her barriers against him and waved her hand to remove the collar. “You don’t need that,” she said and the device clicked open and went flying across the room. “I want to feel what it will do to you.”</p>
<p>The waves of his emotions uselessly crashed against her strong mental walls, dying and fading back to him.</p>
<p>“You’ll never turn me to the Dark Side,” he said confidently and that made a twinge of irritation pinch her mind. “Snoke tried once, even before you were born, did he tell you that? He got his ass kicked by my mother and my uncle and scurried away back to the slimy hellhole he spawned from.”</p>
<p>She hadn’t known. But it was of little importance.</p>
<p>Kira Ren smirked and stared at her enemy. Her smile widened until she was cackling loudly, wiping that confident look from his face.</p>
<p>“Oh, no, Jedi,” she replied. “I don’t want you. I want only a part of you.”</p>
<p>She witnessed his face changing in confusion.</p>
<p>“You... you will give me a baby,” she continued and his face blanched, his fear spiking through the bond.</p>
<p>“W-what?”</p>
<p>She opened up her mind to him and let him see Snoke’s plan. She revelled in his fear and anger, but most of all in his helplessness.</p>
<p>“My master will have his revenge.” She said, coming closer. Ben flinched and struggled against the restraints again.</p>
<p>“No, don’t do this,” he breathed out. “Please, Rey!”</p>
<p>“That name belongs to a dead child,” she barked. “One who was weak and foolish.”</p>
<p>“No. Not weak, not foolish, but strong and kind.” He said, looking straight at her.</p>
<p>“You think you know me because of this... connection?” She sneered, gesturing between them. “You don’t, Ben Solo. I will show you the Dark Side.”</p>
<p>She pulled on the tie of her robe and it fell, pooling around her feet. She controlled her will to put it back on and pushed through.</p>
<p>Ben’s jaw fell open and his eyes roamed her entire body, taking her in. She was glad to feel the rush of desire that came through the bond, as strong as her own. </p>
<p>He reached out for her but his pleas crashed uselessly against her barriers.</p>
<p>“I know you, Rey,” he said shakily. “I know you don’t want this. Not like this.”</p>
<p>She barked out a laugh. “See, this is where you’re wrong, Jedi. There is nothing that I want more than to please my master. And it makes no difference if you’re willing or not. I know your body will respond to me. And I will take what I want from you.”</p>
<p>“No…” Ben panted.</p>
<p>The only time she had ever touched herself, Snoke saw it afterwards on his routine inspections of her mind. He had punished her for hours, saying that a true member of the Dark Side didn’t indulge in such useless waste of energy. She hadn’t tried since then. So she had to research on her own how to perform the act and had stumbled upon several biology holobooks. The most important information she got was that arousal was involuntary.</p>
<p>She straddled him and opened up his tunic, exposing his chest. She moved her hands down his torso, noticing how warm and soft his skin was, and undid his belt and his trousers. Both were breathing hard when she pulled the garment down. Then, she pulled down his underwear.</p>
<p>She gasped. His cock was already half hard; she saw it twitching towards his belly and his entire body flushed.</p>
<p>Without looking at him, she grabbed it and touched it almost mechanically, repeating the motion she learned from the holo.</p>
<p>Ben moaned and shut his eyes, his body arching from the bed and into her hand.</p>
<p>“Rey, please…” she heard him say.</p>
<p>She felt herself getting wet with the feeling of his cock in her hand, it amazed her how quickly it became full and thick under her touch. The shape of it was fascinating to her, from the balls to the veins that snaked up, to the head that peeked from his foreskin. The skin was soft but it was hard underneath and so warm, almost hot.</p>
<p>She let go and moved up his body, becoming face to face with him.</p>
<p>“Rey, please, not like this.” He pleaded.</p>
<p>She ignored him and took his cock in her hand, nudging its head against her opening.</p>
<p>“Rey…” His voice died in his throat when she pushed herself down and felt his cock part her entrance.</p>
<p>There was a sting. Surprised, she gasped and grimaced in pain.</p>
<p>“Rey, stop, you’re in pain,” Ben said in a worried voice. “You’re not ready yet. It shouldn’t hurt.”</p>
<p>She whimpered, lowering herself more onto his length. She kept going, hoping the pain would bring her clarity.</p>
<p>“S-stop…” the word morphed into a deep moan coming out of his throat.</p>
<p>She cried out when he was completely sheathed inside her. It burned and stretched her, but she held on. Ben was huffing and moaning underneath her, his body shaking.</p>
<p>She began to ride his cock, just like she had seen in the holo. He moaned loudly and she felt the burning intensify inside her with the drag of his length. And although this pain was nothing compared to others she had experienced in her life, she hoped he would spill soon.</p>
<p>She looked down at him.</p>
<p>The sight of him beneath her, that beautiful, strong body wringing between her legs, his cock rock hard inside her, filling her so completely, his furrowed brows and pleading, soft eyes and the sounds coming out of him, made wetness surge and coat his cock, and soon the pain was replaced by pleasure.</p>
<p>She let it, but held back, keeping control of her movements.</p>
<p>Taking the collar off was a mistake, she realized, because - even though he couldn’t turn the Force against her - he was using it to hold back his orgasm.</p>
<p>She picked up her pace and his pained expression deepened.</p>
<p>“Untie me…” He mumbled, his breath coming out in huffs in sync with her thrusts. “Let me touch you…”</p>
<p>“You think me a fool, Solo?” She exhaled, voice strained from the effort.</p>
<p>She sat up and braced her hands on his chest for leverage. She curled her hips in tight, short movements and he grunted at each one, biting his lower lip and clenching his fists.</p>
<p>“Release me…” He pleaded one more time. “I want to touch you…”</p>
<p>“You are going to give me your seed,” she said, feeling her control waver from the exquisite pleasure. “You are going to give me a baby. They will be greater than you or me. They will be the greatest Darksider this galaxy has ever seen.”</p>
<p>His wrists were bruised from where he pulled on the restraints, his body shaking, his face washed with pleasure and worry and helplessness.</p>
<p>Ben’s body relaxed and he gasped. She hoped this meant he was climaxing but instead, she felt their bond open widely and she was hit with a vision.</p>
<p>A simple house with friendly faces as neighbours. Friends who she could rely on fighting beside her. Old, kind faces telling her that she could still be saved. Her older self with a long, soft braid, belly round with a child. And Ben at her side, through it all.</p>
<p>Shocked, Rey opened her eyes and sucked in a breath, stopping her movements.</p>
<p>Her heart was flooded by so much emotion it leaked through her eyes. She collapsed onto his chest, sobbing violently.</p>
<p>“Untie me,” Ben said, clearer now. “Please, Rey…”</p>
<p>Rey knew she had failed, and that this time she was sure she would meet her end at her master’s hand, but not before he showed her just how much horrid pain he could conjure.</p>
<p>But even knowing that, she waved her hand and his restraints came loose.</p>
<p>Ben immediately wrapped his arms around her.</p>
<p>“Rey…” he spoke her name so sweetly, caressing her skin. She allowed herself a moment to have that at least, before the end.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” she sniffled pathetically. “I’ll go now.”</p>
<p>She made to pull away from him, but his arms held her in place and he spun them around.</p>
<p>Rey gasped in surprise, both from the sudden change and from what she saw in his eyes.</p>
<p>They were softer than ever, filled with affection and adoration. </p>
<p>“You saw our future too, didn’t you? Solid and clear,” he whispered, still inside her. “Do you want it, Rey?”</p>
<p>Instead of answering, she grabbed his hair and pulled him to her and his lips landed on hers.</p>
<p>Rey had never kissed anyone before but the hunger she had for him guided her. Their mouths devoured each other and their tongues joined, and she felt more pleasure from this than from what she was doing before.</p>
<p>She didn’t have to say it, the bond let him know.</p>
<p>Still hard, Ben rolled his hips onto her and she moaned loudly against his mouth, letting the pleasure run freely across her body at last.</p>
<p>Through the bond, his pleasure joined hers and they fed into one another, growing and expanding. She saw it all, his longing for her, his admiration, his burning affection turning into love.</p>
<p>Rey never thought she could love someone so fast. Rey never thought she could love anyone at all.</p>
<p>Although his movements were a little erratic, he pistoned his cock in and out of her faster, never breaking eye contact.</p>
<p>She opened her body and her mind wider and let him penetrate every inch of her.</p>
<p>“Come with me,” he said, voice strained. “Let’s raise our baby together. Away from him. Away from this Darkness.”</p>
<p>She moaned loudly as another wave of bliss washed over her, brought by the idea of having his child, not because she was serving some dark purpose, but because she wanted to.</p>
<p>His hand left her face and travelled down her chest, grabbing one of her breasts and squeezing in his warm palm. She wished now they had done this sooner, because the pleasure of his touch on the soft skin of her bosom made another rush of slick coat his cock.</p>
<p>He continued his path, never stopping his thrusting, and rounded her ass. He grabbed it and gave shorter thrusts against her hips, hitting her in a new, wondrous angle.</p>
<p>She was moaning uncontrollably, her mouth seeking his, her hands desperately carding through his hair and clutching the muscles of his back.</p>
<p>Ben propped himself onto his forearms, and they both gasped when they looked at the place where they were joined.</p>
<p>“You would have a family,” he thrust into her and she clutched his arms, watching his cock pull out and then back into her again, reaching so deep, deeper than anything ever did. “And I would love our baby with all my heart… I would love you.”</p>
<p>“N-no… You wouldn’t.”</p>
<p>“I would… I do…” He said and his large hand skimmed her belly. Moving lower, his thumb reached the place in her sex that made her scream with a sharp pang of pleasure.</p>
<p>She felt through the bond how much he was enjoying this but also how much he was holding back. But not because he didn’t want to come inside her and refuse her what she wanted in the first place after all, but because he didn’t want this moment to end.</p>
<p>“Oh, Rey… please, come with me…” His pleading voice sounded so sweet.</p>
<p>She looked up at him, panting and feeling her orgasm gathering. “I can’t.”</p>
<p>“Yes, you can,” he said, his body flush to hers again, looking deep into her eyes. “Come with me.”</p>
<p>“Ben…” she shifted her hips so he hit her in all the right places at every thrust.</p>
<p>“Come with me...”</p>
<p>She wasn’t sure what he meant anymore, but sense had abandoned her, and all she could do was feel.</p>
<p>“Come with me...” The last word came out strained as his climax finally hit him. She felt it as much in her cunt as his cock throbbed and filled her womb with his hot seed as well as in the bond when his pleasure made hers almost unbearable.</p>
<p>Her orgasm shattered her. She screamed and her cunt clenched so violently, she could have pushed him out if it hadn’t been for his unrelenting thrusts.</p>
<p>Their remaining cries of passion echoed across the room and when she regained her senses, tears leaked from her eyes.</p>
<p>She grabbed him and kissed him more, and he reciprocated, pouring into the bond this impossible, unbidden feeling they shared.</p>
<p>He parted the kiss to catch his breath, and sweetly stroked her cheeks, still inside her.</p>
<p>“Come with me…”</p>
<p>Reality crept back and she shoved away the wonderful feeling of being in his arms and her face hardened. “I can’t.”</p>
<p>“Please…”</p>
<p>She pushed him away from her and some of his seed leaked onto the sheets. She faintly worried about that, but she was too distraught and confused to think about it.</p>
<p>“As soon as the baby is born, he’ll crush you,” he said and his words stung her deeply. “And they will be left alone.”</p>
<p>She scrambled out of bed and quickly reached for her robe, trying desperately to hide the ache in her heart back in the dark corner of her soul.</p>
<p>“Rey, come with me…” she heard him say as she left the room, the door hissing shut behind her.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*waves hand* This is not the Dark!Rey fic you're looking for...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The cell was Force suppressant; Ben had seen one before when he and his uncle raided the old Sith battlements on Mustaphar. He now wished he had paid closer attention to that particular lesson, not that he could concentrate enough to do anything.</p><p>Ben stared at the dark ceiling as he lay on the small cot, all his thoughts occupied by Rey. The way her sweet lips tasted and how warm her body felt against his. He knew she had been given an order, and he wholeheartedly forgave her for it. He couldn’t explain this connection or these feelings they had for each other, but their confession in that strange moment had surprised him just as much as it had her.</p><p>And her rejection, even if he expected it, made an intense grief clutch his heart. Not because she didn't want him, but because she wouldn't leave the darkness, and that hurt more than anything else.</p><p>Ben hadn't told anyone about the bond he shared with Kira Ren. He considered it something private and precious, that belonged to them alone. Besides, his dear uncle would probably worry too much and want to examine it like one of his precious relics. His mother would surely be concerned that an enemy had access to his mind, and it would be a challenge to convince her that that wasn’t how the bond worked. Ben couldn’t quite tell what his father would say, however, Han never assumed to fully understand the extents of the Force, but Ben predicted he would probably focus on the fact that there was, at last, a girl involved in Ben’s life and tease him to no end, enemy or not.</p><p>His thoughts drifted to the possibility of Rey being pregnant with his child and the bleak future of having them grow up without him, without meeting their loving grandparents and great uncle.</p><p>If there was anything he had learned from his parents, it was that children should never be separated from their families. Ever.</p><p>He had to do something about it.</p><p>The door hissed, bringing Ben back from his thoughts. He sat up on the cot, hoping it was Rey. </p><p>She hadn’t visited him since that day.</p><p>He smiled; even the cloak she was wearing couldn’t hide her silhouette from his eyes.</p><p>“Rey,” he reached out his hand for her.</p><p>She stepped in and the door shut behind her, her face neutral. The absence of the Force was strange and uncomfortable; he couldn't feel her at all.</p><p>A moment passed as she glanced at his stretched out hand, but her face soon crumbled and she rushed to him.</p><p>"Oh," he breathed, catching her in his arms before setting her down in his lap. She clung to him, burying her face on the crook of his neck.</p><p>“Ben,” His name in her perfect lips sounded so sweet.</p><p>His heart swelled and he shifted so his left arm supported her back while the other nudged her chin.</p><p>She looked deeply miserable. “Rey,” he whispered, brushing her cheek with his thumb. “Won’t you talk to me?”</p><p>She shut her eyes and leaned into his hand. He smiled and when she opened her eyes again, she fisted her hand on his tunic and pulled him to her.</p><p>Her soft lips slid against his gently at first, but her body tensed in his arms as she tried to get closer. He held her tighter and the kiss became passionate, almost desperate. She moaned softly against his mouth, just like she had that day when he made love to her.</p><p>His body became hot and his breath quickened. </p><p>Impatience grew in his mind. He wanted to storm his way out of here and take her with him like he promised he would do. Like the vision had shown them.</p><p>He broke the kiss, leaving her slightly startled. “Rey,” he said. “We can leave, we can do it.”</p><p>Frustration clouded her features and her face turned into the mask she put on. “There’s no leaving the Darkness, Ben,” she said. “He’ll always be there.”</p><p>“We can protect you.” Ben said.</p><p>Rey was staring at his chest, one of her hands absentmindedly playing with his hair. </p><p>“Why would I want to step into the Light?” Rey murmured, blinking softly. “Why would I shine a light onto my sins? The Darkness is the only place for those who have this much blood on their hands.”</p><p>“You’re wrong,” he pleaded. “Please, let me show you. My uncle will help you. My parents.”</p><p>“Do you think that Skywalker and General Organa would forgive the person who has waged war against them all this time?” she disentangled herself from his arms and got up. “They would do well to have my head.”</p><p>“They wouldn’t.” Ben almost laughed but controlled himself. He rose to his feet and went after her, taking her face in his hands. “But Rey, what about what you want?”</p><p>Rey didn’t look at him.</p><p>“Rey,” he swallowed, glancing at her belly. “Are you… are you pregnant?”</p><p>She took a few steps back and his heart sank. Reflexively, he tapped into the Force and cursed himself when the silence of the bond hit him. “Rey?” He said, his voice trembling.</p><p>“Forgive me, Ben,” she said, looking contrite. “But this is something that I have to do.”</p><p>Ben furrowed his brows and his hands fell from her. “Do what, Rey?”</p><p>The door hissed and a group of armed stormtroopers entered the cell, binding his hands.</p><p>Ben’s heart sank as he stared at her in disbelief.</p><p>“Snoke’s plan must come true,” she said and he let out his breath. “You are to be taken to Moraband. There, Snoke will be waiting. You will die in front of the entire galaxy to see. By my blade.”</p><p>“No,” Ben breathed. “Rey, please don’t go this way!”</p><p>She turned around without saying another word. He sprung forward, screaming her name, but one of the stormtroopers punched him in the gut and he bent over, gasping for breath.</p><p>Ben was manhandled into a ship, and shackled to the seat, as the ship hovered over the hangar.</p><p>Confused and heartbroken, Ben closed his eyes, but all he could see was Rey’s face.</p><p>He shook his head, steeling himself for what was to come. He wasn’t going down without a fight.</p><p>Without the cell, the Force sang through his mind, ready for him.</p><p>Closing his eyes in concentration, he reached into the Force. “Mother,” he pleaded, straining with the effort. “Mom.”</p><p>The trip was short and they landed on the planet only a few minutes later, breaking Ben’s concentration. He had no idea where his mother was or if she would hear it, but he prayed to the Force to give him this chance.</p><p>The ramp lowered and they dragged him outside. His eyes burned with the harsh light and the dust of a red planet. They were at a large plain before a mountain, surrounded by fissures in the rocky landscape. Above, dark blue skies with two moons shone their light onto the surface of the ancient Sith planet of Moraband.</p><p>They led him to a circular platform, where Snoke’s red guards surrounded an altar. Droids were hovering above them, no doubt to broadcast the execution. Behind the altar, sat Snoke on a throne. And beside him, Rey stood with her master.</p><p>Ben’s heart twisted painfully in his chest at the sight. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her, challenging her to look at him, but she kept her gaze to the horizon.</p><p>The troopers shoved him to his knees at the altar, shackling him to the ground. Ben heard the ship depart right after and he was left alone with them.</p><p>“Ben Solo, the elusive Jedi,” Snoke spoke from his throne. “I remember you and your Darkness. Too bad Skywalker had you then. You would have made a magnificent Darksider.”</p><p>“You lost then,” Ben said with all the certainty he was able to fake. “And you will lose now.”</p><p>Snoke’s face was calm. “You don’t need those.” He waved his hands and the shackles fell from his body but Snoke’s power paralyzed him.</p><p>“The whole galaxy is watching, and I know your family is too,” he continued. “The mighty Skywalker blood belongs to me now.”</p><p>Ben struggled against Snoke’s grasp but it was futile, he was too strong. He called for his family again and he was relieved to feel the fear and anxiety blurred into the Force, both from him and his mother and uncle, at least he knew they were coming.</p><p>“You are nothing but a bully,” Ben said through gritted teeth. “Rey is so much more than this. So much stronger than you.”</p><p>Snoke laughed. “No one is stronger than me, my boy,” he said. “She serves me and will be the vessel for my future apprentice. And you will die knowing that your child will be mine.”</p><p>Rey, who up until now had been impassive, took her lightstaff and ignited it, the crimson blade unfolding and creating a semi circle in the air.</p><p>He reached out to her but her barriers were back up, stronger than ever. His heart was broken but somehow, he still believed in her.</p><p><em> “Ben… we’re coming…” </em>Ben heard his mother’s voice in his head, he just needed to buy time.</p><p>“Rey, you deserve to be free, you deserve to live--” his throat constricted with the invisible grasp of Snoke, and all he could do was watch as Rey walked over to him with her weapon in her hand.</p><p>“She is mine, as your child will be, Jedi,” Snoke said triumphantly. “I see her mind, I see her every intent. Yes, Kira Ren is ready to strike. Ready to kill her true enemy!”</p><p>Ben looked at her with pleading eyes and the bond strained. Not a trace of doubt painted her face and she even grinned when she raised her lightstaff.</p><p>Ben thought of his mother and father, and the pain his death would bring them; no one should have to witness the death of their child. His dear uncle and mentor, who loved him like a son. Uncle Chewie and Lando. The child in Rey’s womb, that he would never meet.</p><p>Rey swung her weapon and it hit its target.</p><p>Snoke’s body was impaled on the chest by her lightstaff. His eyes bulged for a second and then his body slumped on the throne when Rey summoned her weapon back to her.</p><p>Ben’s body was released immediately and he landed with his hands and knees on the floor but quickly got to his feet, staring at Rey.</p><p>Wide-eyed and chest heaving, she nodded at Ben and produced his lightsaber from her robes. He stretched out his hand and it went flying back into his grasp.</p><p>Snoke’s guards closed in on Rey and Ben, who turned, standing back to back.</p><p>Ben quickly decapitated the first one and Force pushed the second as another two locked blades with him. Twisting his lightsaber, he made one guard stumble, being readily impaled on Ben’s weapon. Ben exchanged a few attacks with the other but they were no match for Ben’s skill and lost both of their weapons before they were pushed into the abyss.</p><p>Rey sliced through three guards at once, spinning her staff. With efficient and graceful movements, she Force pulled one guard and skewered them in her blade. She extinguished one of the blades and went after the last guard who only parried a few attacks. Soon, they joined the other charred corpses on the ground.</p><p>They were both panting and had locked eyes. Rey raised her open hand and the droids that were still hovering above them froze. Then, she closed her fist and they shrunk and twisted, until they dropped to the ground.</p><p>Ben’s heart was racing, both from the thrill of the fight and the joy at what she had done. He wanted to run to her but she slowly turned around to the throne.</p><p>Screaming, she ignited her blade and charged at Snoke. She sliced through his dead body several times until parts and pieces were spread around the throne. She growled and grunted at each blow, leaving charred marks on the stone with the violence of her anger.</p><p>Blindly, she swung her weapon until Snoke’s body was indiscernible and only stopped when she slipped and lost balance, her staff switching off and dropping to the floor.</p><p>Ben caught her before she fell, kneeling down on the ground to hold her while she cried.</p><p>“He’s gone,” she heaved through her sobbing lungs. “He’s gone…”</p><p>“Yes, Rey, it’s over…” Ben kissed her head and let her cry, rocking her and holding her tight.</p><p>When she looked up at him, her eyes were so beautiful under the planet’s sun; they were hazel, almost green and they shone with specks of gold, even if they looked so sad.</p><p>She was so beautiful, but nothing could have prepared him for her smile. It lit up her face and made her eyes shine even brighter. Ben would have smiled too if he weren’t so smitten staring at hers.</p><p>Her eyes fell to his lips.</p><p>Ben pulled her to him and she to her, desperately trying to be closer. The kiss was a full one, burning with this blazing desire and emotion they shared; it tasted salty with tears but so sweet in its softness.</p><p>When it ended, Ben opened his eyes and they met her hazel ones. The bond was wide open again. There was an unbridled joy from him, seeing her here. But on her side, her happiness was tainted with a deep sorrow that Ben couldn't quite place.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” she said. “I couldn’t tell you. He would see.”</p><p>“You were brilliant, Rey,” Ben smiled but she didn’t and then he remembered.</p><p>He put a hand over her belly and she put hers over his. When his mother was pregnant, Leia told him that she could feel him in her womb, so now Ben gently searched for it. It seemed strange that he couldn’t feel anything. But maybe it was too soon?</p><p>“I’m not pregnant, Ben,” Rey said, sensing his unspoken question. “It wasn’t the right time.”</p><p>Relief and disappointment washed over him, but he would examine that later. “How did you...”</p><p>“I showed Snoke our vision,” she said ruefully, “He was so eager to kill you that he believed it.”</p><p>Ben smiled at her, cradling one cheek in his hand. Another kiss, a softer one, but no less glorious.</p><p>The Force rippled and tugged at the same time as a ship broke the atmosphere. Both looked at the sky and Ben spotted the familiar shape of his father’s ship, the bond he shared with his mother growing stronger with the proximity.</p><p>They got up, Ben never letting go of Rey’s hand.</p><p>“Oh, Ben, I wanted it,” she said, with a deep longing in her voice, making him turn to her. “I wanted that life. More than anything. But…”</p><p>“You can have it,” he said. “I promised you.”</p><p>“I’m a murderer, Ben, and,” Rey gulped. “So many other things.”</p><p>The familiar noise of engines roared near, but Ben held her in his arms. “There is forgiveness for you, Rey. I’ll help you.”</p><p>Rey’s eyes danced over his face and she took his hand to kiss it.</p><p>The Millennium Falcon landed beside them and Ben saw his father and uncle Chewie in the cockpit but not his mother and uncle Luke. There was a nervous energy coming from the inside of the ship.</p><p>“Wait here.” Ben told Rey.</p><p>The ramp didn’t even finish lowering and Leia was out, followed by Luke who had his lightsaber ignited.</p><p>“Wait, Leia!” Luke shouted at his sister who was running to Ben.</p><p>“Mom!” Ben muttered and ran faster towards her and caught her in his arms.</p><p>“Oh, Force, Ben!” She hugged him as hard as her short arms would allow. “My darling boy.”</p><p>“Mom…” Ben hugged her small frame tightly, sighing in relief.</p><p>“I was so worried,” she said, making him look at her and clutching his cheeks. “Are you alright?”</p><p>“Yes, Mom.” Ben smiled but saw someone else approaching. “Dad!”</p><p>“Ben,” His father huffed, hugging him tight and kissing his head. “We came as soon as you called and then we saw you...” Han’s voice was shaky and he couldn’t finish his sentence; Ben had never heard him like that.</p><p>Ben hadn’t spotted Chewie but he wasn’t surprised when he felt furry arms envelop them all.</p><p>“You’re alive and safe, it’s all that matters,” Leia said.</p><p>Ben smiled and broke the embrace. The faces he loved the most were there smiling at him after he had thought he would never see them again.</p><p>Ben searched for his uncle then, who unusually hadn’t greeted him. He found him staring behind him, holding his green lightsaber in a defensive position with furrowed brows.</p><p>Ben turned his head to where Luke was staring.</p><p>Rey looked terrified standing alone in the middle of the arena. She was still holding her lightstaff in her hand and her wide, worried eyes were watching Luke.</p><p>“Uncle,” Ben said, still in Chewie and his parents’ arms. “Put down your weapon, she’s not a threat.”</p><p>Luke didn’t seem to be listening but Ben didn’t feel animosity from him.</p><p>Before Ben could do anything, Rey walked closer and fell to her knees, her lightstaff placed on both of her stretched out palms to offer it to Luke.</p><p>“Master Skywalker,” she said. “The Supreme Leader is dead. I killed him. The First Order is no more. I surrender.”</p><p>Luke reached out and the weapon flew to his metallic hand.</p><p>“I’m ready to accept punishment for my crimes,” she said, her gaze to the ground. “I’m here to forfeit my life.”</p><p>Luke extinguished his lightsaber and crouched down in front of her, but Rey didn’t dare look.</p><p>Ben shot a glance at his parents and Chewie, giving them a reassuring smile before he moved and knelt beside her, wrapping his arms around her shaking body.</p><p>Luke smiled his kind smile at Ben who reciprocated.</p><p>“We do not take our enemies’ lives, Kira Ren.” Luke said, and Rey finally lifted her gaze to him. “This is not the way of the Jedi.”</p><p>Rey gaped at him and then at Ben, her eyes swimming with tears.</p><p>“I don’t… I don’t understand.” She whispered and Ben held her hand. She grabbed it so tight.</p><p>At this moment, more ships broke atmosphere. The Resistance had come along with the other Jedi.</p><p>Rey looked up and trembled, but only for a second. Her unbelieving eyes darted from Ben, Luke, to Han, Leia and Chewie.</p><p>“You must pay for what you did, my child,” Luke continued. “Death is a path that we all must take but it is not payment. Redemption must be achieved with actions.”</p><p>Tears escaped from Rey’s hazel eyes and she squeezed Ben’s hand tighter. “But…”</p><p>“Will you help us take down what’s left of the First Order?” Leia asked, kneeling down beside Luke, making Rey look at her. “Will you help us hunt down the Knights of Ren and bring them to justice?”</p><p>The bond changed with Rey’s emotions, they surged and soared until they mingled with his. Ben was comforted by that and he sent his own back at her, helping her angst extinguish itself at last.</p><p>Despite the tears, her lips quirked up with a tentative smile as she held onto Ben.</p><p>“I will.” She said, looking at Ben. “I want to.”</p><p>Ben smiled and he restrained a will to kiss her again.</p><p>“The road to redemption is a long one,” Luke’s sharp blue eyes regarded her with kindness. “And these are your first steps.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If only...</p><p> </p><p>Also, if Ben had been the Jedi and Rey the darksider, they would NEVER have killed her off and deprived the male hero of his pet female villain/love interest... Just sayin'.</p><p> </p><p>Thank you so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*Spoiler: Snoke orders Rey to rape Ben so she can get pregnant with his child as revenge against the Skywalkers. Rey complies but she regrets it and stops in the middle of it and then it turns consensual.*</p>
<p> <br/>Here is the manip in more detail. I'm in love.</p>
<p><br/> <br/>You may find me on Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/ceciliasheplin">@ceciliasheplin</a> or on my <a href="https://curiouscat.qa/ceciliasheplin">CuriousCat</a> if you want to say hi.<br/>Feedback and comments are appreciated!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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